Tag Archives: love

May11

Silence

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When you are thrown into silence, you have no choice but to dive in also …

What’s Cooking This Week

Not all things in life could be fixed, especially the ones you have no control over. You can always mediate your reaction to them though, chocolate, and desserts in general, found to be a good mediator, for just about anything.

Chocolate-Almond Loaf with Maple Glaze

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Makes 2 loaves:

1 stick of butter, melted

1/2 cup of olive oil

5 eggs, room temperature

1 cup of flour (I used Authentic Foods gluten free multi-blend)

1 cup of almond flour

1/2 cup of cacao powder

3/4 cup of raw sugar

1/4 cup of maple syrup

2 tspoons of baking powder

In a bowl, beat together eggs and sugar, then add maple syrup and beat again. Whisk together melted butter and oil and set aside. In another bowl, combine all the dry ingredients.

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Gradually combine the dry ingredients and the egg/sugar mix, then whisk in butter/oil into the dough. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. Grease two loaf pans and pour the batter in. Bake for about 40-50 minutes. Cool completely before removing from the pans and icing.

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Maple glaze:

1 Tbspoon of butter

1/4 cup of maple syrup

1 cup of powdered sugar

In a small pan melt the butter and then add maple sugar boiling the mix for 1 minute on a low flame, gradually whisk in powdered sugar until all is incorporated. Glaze the loaves right away before butter starts to harden again.

The not too sweet loaf with a hint of almond is perfectly mediated by sweet maple glaze, and in that moment, life is perfect again…

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Enjoy!

Apr22

Any Given Day or Time

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And that is truly so I think! Everything is an experience we learn during our lifetime, the good, the bad, the happiest and the most ugly ones, all days come together to create a unique path that each of us follow. No life is ever alike, some we might say are easier than others, though never judge “the book by its cover”, the most ferocious battles are held inside that do not depend on how much money you have or how successful others view you. And  the “richest” people in the world are the ones who feel they have enough to be happy and fulfilled on all possible levels.

To strike a balance between your inner world, your needs, wants, aspirations and the environment around you, which includes people in your life, is truly a happy place. Emotional independence is that balance where you know who you are and how exactly to lead your life without any outside influence, be it in a relationship, work front or a chance encounter, that would knock you off your feet, bring anxiety and make you question yourself, the value of your being and the validity of your choices.

So then if you have a great day, you bask in all the glory of that happiness, no matter how fleeting it may be. And if you have a less that stellar day, you gain an experience, even if only to contrast and to recognize that when the next good day comes, you should enjoy it, and not question whether you deserve it or not, or when your luck is supposed to run out. And when a black period strikes, seemingly full of lost hopes and bleak outcomes, you learn a lesson of what mistakes were made and how possibly to avoid them in the future, and what always remains including your spirit and the most important life values, who is still “in your corner” and which people are gone to follow their own road.

In the big “Bingo of Life” we never know which number comes up next and whether you lose or win at the end or on any given day. We don’t always have any control over it, sometimes we think we do, but life is so illusory, we all get surprised with how fast the “sand castles” can topple over or be blown off by the wind.

Then what does still stand when everything is disappeared or gone with the wind? The answer is always the same: YOU! Your spirit, your inner strength, your value of yourself, your faith, your dreams.

So, no matter good, bad, ugly or the most blissful, the time and circumstances will always pass, the one who stands and maintains a balance despite the mad scale swings is the one who is an ultimate winner!

What’s Cooking This Week

Not all meals are created equal, some are more elaborate than others, and other ones are made for specific occasions. Though probably nothing is better than to shake that “Bingo bag” and have something unexpected or at a “wrong time of the day”. This recipe I feel is pretty versatile, it’s really whatever you want it to be, a filling breakfast, a great addition to your lunch soup or even a savory side dish for a weekday dinner. And it won’t take a lot of your time in the kitchen too.

Sausage, Cheddar and Chives Muffins

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Makes 12 muffins:

1 package/4 links of sausage, cut up (I used chicken apple sausage)

4 eggs

3/4 cup of milk (I used unsweetened almond milk)

3/4 cup of shredded cheddar cheese (I used daiya)

1 3/4 cups of flour (I used multi-blend Authentic Foods gluten free mix)

1 Tbspoon of Dijon mustard

3 Tbspoons of chopped fresh chives

2 tspoons of baking powder

1/4 tspoon of salt

1/2 tspoon of basil

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In a bowl combine together flour, salt, basil and baking powder. In another bowl beat up the eggs and mix in cut up sausage with milk, mustard, chives, then add shredded cheese/daiya. Gradually combine with the flour mix.

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Pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees, grease the muffin pan and fill almost to the top. Bake for about 20-25 minutes or untill the tops are lightly golden, cool off completely before removing from the pan.

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The muffins are slightly crusty outside but soft and very moist inside, almost impossible to have just one, so indulge, for breakfast, lunch or any other given time.

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Enjoy!

Apr8

Get Your Cheer Pom Poms Out

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What do we really mean when we say ” I’m there for you”?! Do we mean I’m there till the road gets tough, or do we mean till you decide to turn the wrong direction?

Then “there” becomes just a particular spot in life where WE feel you should be. And if you’re not, you’re on your own kid!

Much is talked about “unconditional love” (in a greater sense of it), very little is actually seen in real life. When you love somebody, whether romantically or not, you have that person’s best interest at heart. You show care, concern and appreciation that you have that person in your life. You listen, comfort and console when they need to vent or are seeking emotional connection. You set your needs aside and concentrate on what’s important if your loved one is ill or in a crisis. You offer what’s needed and when it’s needed.

Pretty “straightforward” and surely conventional.

But what about all the times when you’ve provided the care, listened to all the concerns, voiced your advice and offered some assistance, yet they are still not there where you want them to be, or even turning the wrong way (despite your desperate pleas and help in trying to get them back on a road)?!

What do you do then, do you turn and walk away (not looking back at the wreckage just about to happen)? Or do you stay and continue to offer the same care, concern and assistance as you did when things were going the way you wanted them? Well, it’s up to you of course, whatever it is that you can actually master. But don’t talk about love then if you decide to turn away, it doesn’t work that way, you don’t get to choose if and when, you just do!

So if you truly love somebody unconditionally, you simply get on a sidewalk and cheer. You support the person no matter what, even if you don’t agree with their actions. You support whatever big or small aspirations they set out for themselves, whether it’s a marathon or a sprint distance, if it’s hot or cold on that sidewalk, you put your best cheerleader uniform on, get the pom poms out and just cheer!

Yes, it is very possible (or even probable) that they are making a mistake, and yes, some mistakes are way more costly than other. Your job is to continue providing encouragement along the road so that they don’t feel abandoned and let your love carry them (possibly towards a speeding freight train).

If anything, you should be nearby as most likely you’d be the one helping to clear out the wreckage!

What’s Cooking This Week

In honor of “love” post, I thought it’d be nice to continue the theme and make some dessert to show my appreciation to the ones I love. As always gluten free yet completely delicious, and the heart shape adds nicely to the whole picture.

Vanilla and Strawberry Coconut “Heart” Cake

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Cake (makes 4 mini heart cakes):

 6 eggs, room temperature

1/4 cup of almond or coconut milk

1/4 cup of coconut oil, melted

1/2 cup of coconut flour

6 Tbspoons of honey or agave nectar

1 tspoon of vanilla

1/2 tspoon of baking powder

1/2 tspoon of orange zest

1/2 tspoon of salt

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In a bowl whisk together milk, eggs, vanilla and orange zest, then add honey/agave and melted but slightly cooled off coconut oil.

In a separate bowl combine together flour, salt and baking powder. gradually mix in the dry ingredients into the wet ones.

Pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees. Oil four mini heart cake pans and distribute the batter evenly between the pans. Bake for about 25-30 minutes.

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Strawberry and vanilla frosting:

5-8 strawberries, thinly sliced

1 1/2 cup of organic Spectrum shortening

1/4 cup of seedless strawberry jam

1 tspoon of vanilla

1 + 2 cups of powdered sugar

(optional) red food coloring, pink sugar crystals, sugar pearls

Whip shortening until light and fluffy, then divide it in half. Combine one half with strawberry jam and then gradually whip in 1 cup of powdered sugar, add a couple of drops of red food coloring to make it a deeper pink color. Combine the other half with vanilla and whip in 2 cups of powdered sugar for vanilla frosting.

Once the cakes are cool, slice the top parts off to make two even layers. Spread some strawberry frosting on the bottom half and place sliced strawberries on top.

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Cover with the top layer and frost the entire cake with strawberry frosting. Then use vanilla frosting to decorate each cake as desired. This barely sweet cake pairs perfectly with a combo of two “sugar rush” frostings.

A variation on strawberry cake can be this vanilla and blueberry one.

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Enjoy! And share with the ones you love!

Feb14

Sweet Valentine

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Happy Valentine’s Day! No matter if you are attached or single, savor the air full of love and joyous feelings and appreciate the relationships (be it love related or not) you have in your life. Every human connection is a gift that’s brought into your life by the Divine Order, however, long or short that may be, to enjoy each other, possibly learn from each other and continue on your own path of growth and self-development.

If you are in a relationship, take a moment to let your partner know how much they mean to you, even if not every day is all “kisses and roses”. As a matter of fact, reach out to every person in your life who is important and do the same. Love is never just intimate relationship related, love is Love, it just is!

And if you’re single this Valentine’s Day, be gentle on yourself and take it lightly, just go out and celebrate, have fun with your un-attached status. Make sure to have a princess dress and a tiara at hand and get in touch with your “inner child”. Sing it like Sophia Grace and make moves like Rosie :) .

What’s Cooking This Week

Valentine’s Day is inevitably associated with sweets and chocolate in particular. If you ask me though, chocolate is pretty much a daily necessity in my menu, it’s my BFF, Valium and an alcohol-chaser, it’s just one of those things that makes life much more tolerable. So it was a no-brainer what to make this Valentine’s Day. Yet I felt it didn’t have to be necessarily rich and void of nutrients. This recipe is a great “bridge” without compromising the sweet cravings for something decadent, or spending a lot of time in the kitchen. Use that time to be with your Valentine!

Chocolate Almond Torte with Strawberry Rum Sauce

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(makes 3 mini heart cakes):

3 eggs

1/2 cup of plain yogurt (I used coconut yogurt by So Delicious)

1/3 cup of almond flour

2 Tbspoons of coconut flour

2 Tbspoons of cocoa

2 Tbspoons of sugar

1/4 tspoon of cinnamon

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Sauce:

1 cup of chopped strawberries

2 Tbspoons of rum

2 Tbspoons of sugar

1 tspoon of lemon juice

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Beat together eggs, sugar and yogurt. In a separate bowl, combine together both flours and cinnamon, add into wet ingredients and incorporate well. Oil 3 mini heart cake pans and fill each about 3/4 full.

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Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes. Let the cakes cool off a bit before removing from pans.

While they are baking, make the sauce. Blend together strawberries and lemon juice in a blender. Transfer the mixture into a small pan, add sugar and cook on a slow heat for a few minutes until sugar is dissolved, then add rum and cook until alcohol is evaporated and all the liquids are reduced. Let the sauce to stand for a couple of minutes before serving.

Serve the cakes and sauce slightly warm to fully enjoy their soft texture and rich flavors.

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Enjoy! Share with your Valentine!

Jan5

Treading Lightly

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While you tread lightly my heart pulls away

Barriers built for years to protect

Only broken with regret

Feet itching to bolt, head making me stay

Breathe the small voice says

Shudders ripple down my skin

Take a deep breath, and let it begin

The Qi begins to smooth the way

The wires spark, the signal transcends

A jolt to the heart, disperses away the sin

Whispering winds wash it all away

Darkness burning into light

Electricity turning into love so bright

The warm inviting yellow light behind her head

Draws you to her arms as she leads you to bed

                                                                                                                                         Gidyean

As I was standing on a train platform by Columbus Circle, tired but quite satisfied with how the evening went clutching my shopping bags full of shiny new purchases, a delicate scene was unfolding right in front of my eyes but being completely ignored by oblivious no-nonsense New Yorkers. 

 A couple was standing waiting for a train too yet you could tell they wished that the train would never come.  The guy was pacing back and forth ever so slightly, his gaze is darting to the girl’s face for a second and back down to his feet, eyes full of desire and hesitation drawn into a struggle and a balancing act all mixed in one. The girl held his gaze composed and sure as if the chosen path has already replayed in her mind and felt so right, as it had happened already. But dare I say, she had her own battles deep inside her, yet she continued whispering in his ear some soft words that ignited him even more, and he lifted his eyes to look into hers and just say “yes”.

You can guess that perhaps they just met and led by their instant passion got lost in a circle of doubt and want, but one of them had to find a way to get them both out and on a road to possibly share something wonderful.  And as the girl continued to smile and stepping closer and closer towards him, the guy seemed to be resolved to silence his doubts at least for a second and concede to his desire as he also stepped forward so they can share a brief but passionate kiss.

When my train came,  leaving them back at the platform, I dropped on my seat, the whole scene is still replaying in my mind, and wishing that those two would figure it all out before their train comes too. But if you ask me, I think the girl will lead him to bed… :)

What’s Cooking This Week

Sometimes you look at certain foods and combining them together is not the first thing that automatically comes to your mind. Or maybe you have presented them together and are now tired of the same old ways. Perhaps those two on a train platform were not meant to be together as a conventional couple, but who is to say that following their passion and not their common sense will produce a less meaningful or even less important in their lives relationship?! Sometimes you simply have to follow where your heart takes you. And combine old things in a new way to create interesting flavors. Just make sure you tread lightly. :)

Cranberry Rice Stuffed Delicata Squash

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2 delicata squash

1 cup of uncooked rice

1/2 cup of dried cranberries (I used dried whole berries)

1 Tbspoon of oil spread or butter (I used Earth Balance Coconut Oil spread)

1 Tbspoon of fresh lemon juice

1/2 tspoon of nutmeg

salt, pepper, lemon seasoning

mint leaves for garnish

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Cut the squash in half lengthwise, scoop the seeds out, lightly rub the insides with salt, pepper and lemon seasoning, wrap each half in foil and roast at 400 degrees for about 30 minutes or untill the knife easily runs through.

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In a mean while, cook the rice according to directions in salted water, then stir in oil spread/butter, nutmeg and dried cranberries.

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When both the squash and rice are ready, let them cool off a bit and then stuff the rice inside each squash half. Bake at 350 degrees for 10-15 minutes. Garnish with chopped mint leaves.

A wonderful healthy meal that could serve as either satisfying lunch or a dinner side dish.

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Enjoy!

Dec3
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Everybody knows that an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Apples are surely abundant all year round and generally not that expensive, so there shouldn’t be any excuses why you can’t have them if not every day, but at least farely often. All the vitamins and antioxidants and extra iron will be beneficial to your whole body. And you definitely have your pick, no matter the sweet, the tart or a hybrid variety, apples are a wonderful addition to any healthy lifestyle. Plus they just taste great!

But what about a nice helping of an “emotional” apple-a-day? At a time that may be busy or stressful, do you also remember to stop and give yourself a pat on a back? Even if you feel you don’t really deserve it, or you think you didn’t do the best job, because chances are, you actually did, the best you could master at this particular time. When you run around trying to take care of everybody and everything, don’t ever forget yourself, have a daily “I love you” message going straight to you heart, and smile, smile every time you pass a mirror. :)

I have a client, a young guy whose “alter” ego seems to win most of the time. In a constant battle of good vs. demeaning, his negative side always has the last word. I think we can all relate to that on some level. We’ve all had an experience where in a long chain of conversations with yourself, the last statement of something like “you’re still a loser” sticks with you and continues to poison your whole being long after the words stopped vibrating in your head. So as he sits in front of me every week and on my prompt says that “he is awesome”, I know he doesn’t believe it, but I also know that if I stop pushing him to vocalize something good about himself, he will continue his journey deeper into the twilight. Therefore unless you want to forever be lost in a world of “empty glasses”, you need to find a way to always finish the “me and I” conversation on a positive note, even if you literary have to utter the words, turn around and run before the negative side overtakes the process yet again.

It’s your “a praise a day keeps the blues away” emotional pat on a back that should be practiced right along with eating your apples. :)

What’s Cooking This Week

Some foods naturally go together, like peanut butter and jelly or strawberries and cream. I think just about anything pairs perfectly with apples, but apples and cheddar create an especially marvelous combination. This recipe is incredibly simple but simply delicious.

Oven Baked Apple-Cheddar Stuffed Chicken

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6 chicken breasts, skin and bones removed

1 large or 2 small apples

1 small onion

6 slices of cheddar (I used daiya cheddar cheese)

1/2 cup of bread crumbs (I used Gillian’s gluten free crumbs)

2 eggs, beaten

1 tspoon of herb blend like Italian

salt, pepper, oil spray

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Wash, pat dry chicken breasts with paper towels and rub some salt and pepper on the outside. Mix bread crumbs with herbs and little salt and pepper. Thinly slice onion and apples, removing apple core first.

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Butterfly each chicken breast lengthwise but not completely cut off, arrange onion and apple slices inside the chicken and top with cheddar slices.

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Place the top part of chicken breast back, secure with tooth picks if needed, dip each chicken piece in beaten egg and then into bread crumbs. Spray a baking dish with oil spray and arrange all chicken topping with more apple slices.

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Bake at 400 degrees for about 25-30 minutes. If you have any other vegetables, cut and mix them with the same herb blend you were using for the chicken. Cook them in a separate dish in the oven while chicken is also being made.

Here I paired chicken with yellow squash pieces for a healthy yet completely satisfying meal.

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Enjoy!

Nov16
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What do you feel when you look at your child? Love, of course, care, a sense of fierce protection, but also a blood connection and belonging to the same family. It feels like the child is a combination of all the myriad puzzle pieces that individually do belong to either mom’s or dad’s side, but together make a whole different picture of a unique human being.

I look at my son and see my chin dimple on his chin too, he has his dad’s posture and walk. And what do you get when you combine his dad’s piercing blue eyes with my deep brown ones? I guess what the kid has, his grayish-green chameleon eyes.  He has his dad’s interests in electronics and technology, but deep inside he is also into some things that make up my life, like human psyche (even if to prove that sometimes I’m wrong :) ). He has, behind a seemingly calm or even aloof appearance, a passionate and independent spirit, that clearly comes from me, and he has his dad’s conservative side in clothes and appearance (at least comparing to modern teens). And he does “burst in flames”  on certain occasions, especially around some changes or authoritative influences, that comes from both parental sides, so he got a double dose. He is surely a child of his parents. :)

Despite the fact that this is my birthday week, it’s all about the kid as we’re currently spending several days in Boston. In Cambridge, to be exact, as he is going to participate in MIT Splash weekend for high schoolers. And we’re visiting Harvard Engineering too while we’re at it. Yes, dream big but have a huge safety net also! Potentially, I can send him to college now, according to his PSATs, he is already above the  national average level (he is only 15 so we have almost 2 years to prepare), but as he got on my nerves today, I was seriously considering just dropping him off at one of the Boston area colleges and leave LOL.

So, kid, you better not spoil it as this mama is willing to spend her birthday weekend away and with just you around. But if I think about all the craziness in the past few weeks after the hurricane, job relocation and all the related inconveniences, a bit of a solitude as he is stuck in classes all weekend is actually a good thing to look forward to. :)

What’s Cooking This Week

As the post seems to be all about the kid, we have to make his favorite food, at least one of them. The kid LOVES chili! Somehow he likes mine the best. :) This one is a special recipe combining many of his favorite ingredients, all in one pot, kid, so go nuts!

“Gus’ Delight” Chili

1 lb of ground beef

1 lb of sausage meat

1/2 cup of pancetta

1/4 cup of crumbled bacon

1 can of black beans

1 medium onion

1 medium red bell pepper

1/4 cup of chopped chili peppers (I used the medium heat ones)

1 container of tomatoes/tomato sauce (I used Pomi chopped tomatoes)

1-3 tspoons of chili powder (depending on desired heat level)

1 tspoon of oregano

salt, pepper, olive oil

1 Tbspoon of brown or raw sugar (optional, I like my chili a bit sweet)

Chop the onion, in a pan, heat up some olive oil and saute the onion until golden. Then gradually add both ground beef and sausage meat constantly breaking the lumps as you stir (I like to use a potato masher), when the meat is half way done, add pancetta and crumbled bacon, cook for a couple more minutes.

Chop the peppers and cook everything till almost done.

Drain and rinse beans, add to the mixture, along with tomatoes and all the salt and spices. Cover and simmer until everything is done.

Serve over rice or alongside guacamole and chips (another kid’s favorite).

Enjoy!

Nov12
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Sometimes you get people in your life with whom you have more “goodbyes” than “hellos”. And sometimes those “goodbyes” are more important than the whole relationship because letting go is an act of love in itself and a word of care in action. I had two people like that in my life, I hope you had at least one as I think if you haven’t experienced loss, you won’t have anything to compare how great the love was.

The Prince of Tides is one of my favorite movies, and the book is even more amazing than what you see on a screen. Through love, they find their healing and getting whole again, through love, they lose each other but carry the spark with them throughout the rest of their lives. The separation scene is poignant and emotionally charged at the same time, you feel the loss and the new beginning all entwined in one, you damn the necessity of letting go and you applaud the beautiful closure.

Unfortunately, in life, you don’t always get the farewell you’d imagine to be the best, even if you really wanted it, or felt that you truly deserved it. Sometimes you get “whatever was available” depending on life circumstances and how the other person viewed not just the ending but the whole relationship. And you can cry your eyes out how it happened, or you can complain that it’s not fair, it won’t change the fact that there were two “dealers” in this ” game of broken hearts”, yours just did not win this time, or that time either.

And it’s probably best to leave the winners in their new round of the Russian Love Roulette as they are obviously more successful in it, or at least to wish them that their winning streak would continue.  So long my Prince of Tides, I had more ebb than flow with you, but such was the cycle of that relationship! And the White Horseman, he is long gone on a road of his own, where it leads him, I do not know, but he is happy just to take the journey.

So goodbye my loves! If the farewell was a bit bitter for you, I’m sure you can sweeten it with your new winning card. Till I see you both again, in heaven, in due time for each of us!

What’s Cooking This Week

I think during times like that, you’re allowed to medicate yourself a little, just to take the edge off and get adjusted to the new situation. Whatever your medicine is, the actual pill, some sweets or alcohol, immerse yourself into the experience, cry, if you have to, buy some cheap plates to break a few (learned the hard way), or just quietly curl on a couch sipping your drink and walking down the memory lane.

“Anarchy in the Peddler-Land” Iced Tea

2 oz of vodka (I used Liv potato vodka to make it gluten free)

4 oz of strong black tea, brewed and cooled off

1-2 lemon slices

1 sugar cube

Dissolve a sugar cube in tea, squeeze lemon juice from 1 slice and place it on a bottom of a cocktail glass. Add tea with sugar and then vodka, mix it well, then garnish with more lemon if desired. Skip the ice to make it stronger.

If you still feel sad, have another, or try it with some chocolate.

Enjoy!

Oct15
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When did you feel the most beautiful? Perhaps when you descended the stairs to meet your high school prom date. I bet you felt it walking down the aisle only minutes away from saying “I do” to your spouse. Maybe you thought you looked especially pretty just waking up and meeting a gaze of your adoring partner. Somehow our opinion always rests on a reflection in other people’s eyes to feel beautiful, we need  to rely on an outside approval and societal views on appearances to feel accepted, rarely our self-confidence comes from within. But it really should be the other way around. Your opinion is the only one that truly matters!

When I was undergoing surgeries and chemo treatments, it was far from any glamorous experience you can ever imagine. My body resembled a tic-tac-toe board with all the scars and black and blue marks, I was bold, not even eyelashes or eyebrows, pale and barely standing on my feet. Yet somehow, I still don’t know why, it was the only time in my life when I felt a complete self-acceptance and love, I felt absolutely beautiful and strangely whole. I can’t tell you why and how this happened, maybe it was some hallucinogenic state from all the chemo drugs I was on, or maybe my human spirit, crushed by the physical burden of treatment, gave way to the Eternal Inner Self, and true divine beauty was able to shine through. But as that period fade away and turned to recovery and then remission and now being cancer free, self-doubts and striving for unattainable perfection started to visit my thoughts yet again. As life took over, hair grew back, some color appeared on my cheeks, and scars became thin and barely visible so did the beauty. Isn’t it ironic and particularly sad that we get it wrong every single time?! We find beauty among complete distortion and delusion that has nothing to do with reality and seek answers where only nonsense exists.

We’ve perfected the story of Alice in Wonderland to the point that we don’t know how to get back Home. Yes, I’m guilty of it myself!

What’s Cooking This Week

When speaking of beauty in the kitchen, to me all foods are beautiful, especially the ones that are clean, unprocessed and full of nutrients. Pretty presentation is just that, icing on a cake, it makes the food more appealing but doesn’t change the essence if the dish is full of junk. This recipe is beautiful in its simplicity, and “icing on top” provides a perfect blend of being pretty and healthy.

Pink Series: Recipe # 5

Baked Salmon with Horse Radish Sauce

1.5 – 2 lbs of salmon

1 Tbspoon of lemon juice

1 tspoon any fish seasoning (I used Herbs de Provence)

8 Tbspoons of Horse Radish sauce (both liquid and pulp)

2 Tbspoons of mayo

1 tspoon of seasoning blend (I used Herbamare)

salt, pepper

Wash and pat dry the salmon. Place it in a foil or baking dish, drizzle with lemon juice and sprinkle fish seasoning, salt and pepper.

 Bake at 375 degrees until the fish is flaky but not overdone. In a mean while make the sauce. In a blender combine together horse radish sauce (I used the one with beets to add a splash of flavor and color dimension plus some extra nutrients, if you don’t like it, use the white one), mayo, seasonings and salt/pepper.

The dish is good served either warm or cold. Here we’re having it warm alongside sautéed spinach with sun-dried tomatoes and cauliflower mash.

Enjoy!

Oct2
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5 years ago at this time I was just coming out of the most difficult period in my life. Having just completed a gruelling 8-month journey of a major surgery and 6 rounds of the most aggressive chemotherapy available at the time, I was like a new baby, bald (LOL), vulnerable and very eager to start a new chapter.

It was the beginning of 2007, when I found a big lump in my right breast. With no family history of breast cancer, or actually no cancers at all, and, as I later found out, not even BRCA1 or 2  genetic mutation, breast cancer was on my mind as often as let’s say a Bubonic plague. Too “young” for mammogram and with “non-significant” family history, I was an undesirable candidate for any kind of testing at all. Untill it was too late…

When my cancer was found, it wasn’t in its early stages anymore, it was right on a brink of being metastasized. So you can say it was found right on time. However, it didn’t spare me the need for the most aggressive surgical and chemo options available. But it did ultimately save my life! And I’m very grateful for that!

I always say I’m glad I had cancer, no matter how bizarre it sounds. It’s during the most difficult times when our faith, personality and integrity get tested, and you either come out on top, as a winner, or you break down and sink to the bottom, crushed by your own bitterness and misery. Yes, I’d totally forgo the side effects of chemo, some of which will probably remain with me for the rest of my life, but who I am today is enhanced and validated by that experience, and my positive personality traits are shinier and more visible because of that (and yes, I’m working on a few areas that are still kind of shaky, but aren’t we all a work in progress?!). :)

So today, after 8 months of aggressive treatment and 5 years of post-cancer therapies and follow-up, I’ve finally reached the first survival milestone.

It appears I have survived! :)

And just like a new baby yet again, I’m eager and ready, and a little scared,  to start this next chapter of my life. With no more therapies and less oncology visits, I’m actually facing a “normal life”, or rather say a “new normal”. Whatever that may mean, I do not know yet, but I’m ready to find out!

So please help me celebrate and join me for my new cooking series. During the month of October, to promote breast cancer awareness, I’ll be sharing some personal experiences from my cancer journey along with valuable information to learn more about breast cancer and resources. And with that, I’ll be making recipes of all kinds of pink foods.

From baby pink to orange-red to deep purple ombre, join me on a journey of exploring “Fifty Shades of Pink”! :)

What’s Cooking This Week

Nothing is cooking! Because we’re drinking! :)

We’re celebrating, right?!

When it comes to alcohol, I prefer either wine or vodka. Yes, I know, most vodkas are made from wheat or rye and are still a no-no on a gluten free diet, but for some odd reasons, my body is able to tolerate one shot of grain vodka.  It must be some weird inborn Russian enzymes that help me digest it, but even then, it stops at just one drink. So I make it count! LOL   I usually go for a shot of Balinoff, I like its smooth taste and no bitter aftertaste that some cheaper vodkas leave, or Grey Goose would be my second choice. Some special occasion may call for a higher-end designer vodkas, those are usually location specific, and I’ve had a few great ones.

But this time, I definitely want more than one drink (some occasions are just hangover worthy :) ) so I got this nice looking potato vodka from a local distributor. It was smooth with a slightly sweet undertone, I really enjoyed it and would surely buy again. But it’s the Pink series, right? We need to spice it up, and a diluted vodka with cranberry juice drink is just not going to cut it this time!

Recipe # 1

Homemade Cranberry Vodka

1 bottle, 750 ml, of vodka

1 lb of fresh or frozen whole cranberries

1/2 cup of other cut berries (I used strawberries)

1 Tbspoon of lemon juice

lemon peel from 1 lemon

1 cup of sugar

I had difficulty finding fresh (or even frozen) cranberries at this time, so off I went to the Russian market, you can find all kinds of un-seasonal things there. In a saucepan, combine cranberries, strawberries, lemon juice and sugar and cook on low heat for about 5 minutes till cranberries burst and release their juice.

In a mean while, cut lemon peels in thin strips and place them on the bottom of a large glass container.

Once the berry mixture is cooled off, pour it over lemon peels and then pour in all the vodka. Cover the container with a tightly sealed top and set it aside on a counter for about one week.

After the week is over, open and strain the berries and lemon, then pour the vodka back in the container. Store it in a fridge for up to 1 month (if it lasts that long)! And don’t let the innocent color fool you, just like some women I know, it may be “pretty in pink”, but it’s also pretty strong, it’s your “fight like a girl” premium vodka drink!

Of note, don’t throw the berries out but rather put them in a freezer, they’d make an awesome “no kids invited” cranberry sauce for Thanksgiving dinner. :)

So here I am toasting my difficult but inspiring past 5 years and more healthy ones ahead!

And a toast to all the doctors, nurses, pharmacists and other medical professionals who through their expertise and dedication brought me up to the point where I can enjoy this drink feeling well and looking forward to the future!

And a big toast to my family and friends, especially my mom, who showed much love and care that lifted my spirit and let me concentrate on my recovery and be vulnerable without feeling defeated!

And a huge toast to my baby, my son, who gave me a complete reason to fight the disease and continue my journey on Earth because there is nothing more I love than being his mom!

Oy! And I think I’m drunk (but totally happy)! So you talk among yourselves for now! :)

Enjoy!